I just finished day 4 (the final day) of my outpatient chemo. This process has been relatively easy – no, I take that back, EXTREMELY easy – compared to what I have been through already. On Monday I had to spend a full day at the hospital getting tests, meeting with the doctor and getting all setup to start the chemo. By day two, I simply had to go in, pop some anti-nausea pills for pre-meds and then get hooked up for an hour to an IV drip. That’s it. The days ran a little bit longer this time through because we were just starting everything, but so long as things stay on course, it does seem like this will be a relatively painless and easy experience (knock-on-wood).

My bloodwork has been good, but of course, the numbers took a little dip today after starting this chemo. It is the doctor’s hope that my counts will not dip too low while on this chemo. If they do, they will cut back the amount of chemo I am given or lengthen the period of time between each round. There are 8 rounds total and I have just completed the first one. My white cells are doing great and my neutrophils are almost 80% so it doesn’t look like I should become neutropenic while on this treatment, but I will be monitored weekly to see how my counts are doing and, again, if anything dips too low, we will make adjustments. The dips, if they occur, are supposed to only last for a couple of days – nothing like what happened on my previous treatments.

I had another CT this week which showed that my liver infection is almost completely gone. I’m still having occasional but consistent pain in my right side with no explanation. Now that we know it is not my liver, the doctor will probably do an MRI to rule out any nerve issues, but then we will most likely conclude that it is a muscle issue. I know it’s not leukemia because my biospy results showed I am completely in remission and I know it’s not my liver – knowing those two things makes me a very happy girl.

So aside from spending everyday at the hospital, my family and I pulled off a big surprise party for my dad’s 70th birthday last weekend. Thank you, thank you, thank you to everyone who helped. I think he really appreciated it and I know everyone had a good time.

Now that chemo is done, I am moving into full Christmas mode. I have lots of fun stuff planned for the coming weeks (and hope my blood counts cooperate). I am also hoping to fit in some work. Oh, and there are a slew of holiday parties that I hope to make an appearance at. Most importantly, I’m trying to just find some time to slow down and enjoy this season with the kids, my friends and family.

On a shallow note, I am thrilled that my eyebrows and lashes are making an appearance this holiday season, wahoo! My hair, on the other hand, seems to be holding out for warmer weather … But to be serious for a moment, going back to the hospital this week, I’ve run into so many people that I’ve crossed paths with during my stays. Some are doing really well, others not so much. As much as I struggle with my own fears, anxieties and even depression over this sometimes, I recognize that – so far – I am one of the lucky ones to be getting through this okay. I feel so much sadness when I see someone in the cancer center with their head in their hands after meeting with a doctor. You know they’ve just been given a difficult diagnosis and I just want to lean over and tell them it will be okay. But all of us have to face our own fights and no two journeys will be the same. I hope that there will be a time I can look back and say, “I did it, I kicked cancer’s ass!,” but until I’m done with chemo and at least a year has passed, I’ll live with some fear and hesitation. In the meantime, I hope that I’ll be able to use this experience to help someone else through, just like so many helped me along the way.