Day 66
I got the okay from my doctor to start using Advil again. Who knew what a difference that would make? I started it yesterday and was able to spend the whole day out with Ty and didn’t start running anything over 100 until after 5 pm. The evening was good too but last night may have been one of the worst nights I have had yet. It’s okay though, I’m determined to have a good day today. I’ve been letting this infection get the best of me mentally. I think that it is hard to feel confident about getting better when you’re doctor’s feel so unsure (I feel like I’ve already said this). I need to start looking at this the same way I did the AML and know that I can beat it, no matter what it takes.
As I said, I got to spend a great day with Ty yesterday – lunch just the two of us, shopping for birthday presents and buying all of his soccer gear. Part of me is feeling incredibly accomplished because I’ve gotten so much done in the last few days. But by 3 or 4 pm, it’s nap time (for me), then dinner time, then bathtime, then bedtime. I never realized how exhausting my ordinary life could be. I look forward to the time when it doesn’t feel so overwhelming again.
You’ve got 2 litte ones – boys nonetheless! Of course your ordinary life is exhausting!! We are all exhausted from our regular days with kids too, and we aren’t dealing with half of what you are!!! You are still a trooper in my mind – and I think you have the right idea. Get that visualization going again and keep picturing the fever free days. They will come. Remember how hard it was to be pregnant and get thru those last few weeks, and you thought you would never be able to turn over in bed without it hurting again and never be able to bend over again or walk without waddling. Then all the sudden that was all a distant memory. That’s how this will all be soon for you too!! Keep the faith! Sending you an email of pictures of people from Walmart – it will make you thankful and disturbed and make you laugh all at the same time!!
PS – you really looked great when I saw you at Free State last week!!! Who knew one could look so pretty with all this going on still?!?! Hope to see you again soon! XOXO
I can only imagine how sick and tired of all this you must be. Try not to let it wear you down.
Chip